Kinship Center “Wendy’s Wonderful Kids” Recruiters Change Lives.
Each month, some of the most challenging and hard-to-place foster children in California are finding their adoptive “forever family” through the efforts of Kinship Center family recruiters who work directly with the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, through the Wendy’s Wonderful Kids program.
The Foundation awards grants to select agencies like Kinship Center to undertake aggressive, focused recruitment for families who can make safe, loving, permanent homes for some of the nation’s hardest-to-place children: those who are older, those with extraordinary needs, or those who come in sibling groups.
Hear from some of these children on a powerful video segment from Dave Thomas Foundation.
“Wendy’s Wonderful Kids is a proven program that demands results, accountability and quality service on behalf of the children who need us most,” says Rita Soronen, Executive Director of the Dave Thomas Foundation.
On any given day in the U.S., some 550,000 children are in the foster care system, and more than 150,000 are available for adoption. Kinship Center Wendy’s Wonderful Kids Recruiter Kim Felder has shepherded thousands of adolescents, sibling groups and children with severe medical disabilities into permanent homes during her 20-year career. She takes the time to know each waiting child and does exhaustive research to match those unique needs with the right family. Felder’s devotion to detail ensures a high level of success; in 2009 Felder was awarded the prestigious Congressional “Angels in Adoption” award for her effectiveness in improving children’s lives.
“I have been blessed to pursue my life’s goal of helping children obtain the right to a permanent, loving family,” she says. “I cannot think of anything more important or rewarding.”
A Recommendation by Kinship Center Wraparound Program Director Graham Wright, M.Phil, MSW
Songwriter/singer Mary Gauthier (pronounced Go-Shay) has a new album, The Foundling, that is an overtly autobiographical account of a child abandoned at birth who spent part of her childhood in an orphanage and who later ran away from her mismatched adoptive family and ended up in show business.
Gauthier searched for her birth parents late in life; the album’s track “March 11, 1962″ describes how she finally made phone contact with her birth mother, who refused to meet her. “The Foundling” tells how Mary has come through it all still believing in the power of love.
“We’re all looking for meaning in lives that contain no guarantees…my birth family and my adoptive family loved me the vesy best they could…”
Article by Nancy Murphy, MA, Director of Kinship Center’s Placement Programs, Central Coast and No CA
The adoption process is an exciting one, and a busy time in the life of expecting parents. You’ve been hustling around for months getting everything ready. But after all the paperwork has been submitted, the classes completed, the fingerprints cleared, and the home study beautifully crafted, it seems like there is nothing to do but wait!
Here are some tips on how to use this waiting period to take care of yourself:
1. Formalize your support network and make sure your everyone is ready and clear about what their role will be once your child comes home. You will need family, friends, church members, or others available to talk about your feelings, to support your decision to grow your family through adoption, and to offer respite when you need it. Your support network will be one of the greatest assets you have in building a successful adoption.
2. Attend support groups at your agency or online in order to gain a better understanding of what is ahead. Learn about some of the clinical issues your child may have. Take advantage of additional training you may need. Network with other foster and adoptive parents. Learn from other parents the importance of keeping a sense of humor during trying times. Discover resources that are available to your family once your child comes home.
3. Get your rest! You will need to be in tip top shape for your new infant or child or teen.
4. Read a parenting book. Become familiar with websites that will be easily accessible to you. Bookmark the most helpful pages.
5. Prepare and freeze a few extra meals for those days when you won’t have the energy to cook, but will need quality food.
6. Spend quality time with your partner to rejuvenate your relationship and talk about your family life to come.
7. Keep a journal of your thoughts and expectations so you can reflect later, and so you can share these thoughts with your child when you tell him or her (or them!) their adoption story. There will be nothing as powerful as notes in your own handwriting to convey the depth of your feelings about becoming your child’s parent.
There are multiple resources for you that can help ease the anxiety as you wait to become a parent. Take advantage of the knowledge your adoption professional has, and enjoy the many materials available in adoption magazines, on the Internet, and through other adoptive parents.
Kinship Center hopes you have a wonderful experience!
Post-Permanency Institute offers unique curriculum
A special Summer Institute presented by Kinship Center and hosted by the Center for Human Services at the University of California, Davis campus on August 9-11, 2010 will give child welfare and adoption services workers the practical knowledge and advanced skills to be able to support children after a move into foster care, and ultimately into a permanent home.
Both county and private agency professionals are invited to attend this three-day Institute that will: focus on reducing the long-term impact of moves on children and families, examine the effects of trauma on a child’s brain, understand the importance of previous attachments even when abuse and neglect have taken place, and much more.
July 12, 2010: Free workshop presented by Kinship Center Education Institute and Hartnell Community College
Former 27-year prison inmate Nelson Kowalkczyk has designed and implemented programs in prison, juvenile facilities and community centers that help parents and others understand criminal thinking errors in youth. On Monday, July 12, Kowalkczyk will present two workshops at Kinship Center headquarters in Salinas on techniques for identifying and changing criminal behavior.
Workshop #1: From 10:00 – 12:00, Kowalkczyk will talk with caregivers, parents and youth
Workshop #2: From 12:30 – 2:30 pm, Kowalkczyk will talk with professionals
Topics will include holding youth accountable for their actions, what to listen to (and not listen to) when youth are talking, defensive tactics that keep substance users from changing, the fear of losing face…and much more.
To pre-register for either free workshop, call (831) 443-0662, or click here for the registration form. Walk-ins will be accepted as room permits.
A resource recommended by the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute.
A teleconference last month by the New York City Administration for Children’s Services, in partnership with Mt. Sinai School of Medicine and other partners, explored the effects of secondary trauma among child welfare staff because of the nature of their clients’ experiences.
“Secondary Trauma: Building Resilience among Child Welfare Staff” is now archived and available from the National Resource Center for Permanency and Family Connections. The teleconference also includes a review of an intervention designed to reduce secondary trauma and promote resilience.
Click here to access the teleconference, a PowerPoint, an annotated bibliography, and presenters’ contact information.
As the current generation of nonprofit leaders throughout the country approaches retirement, there will be a scramble to find the next generation of leaders. Should these be seasoned professionals in their 40′s and 50′s, or should nonprofits be opening their minds and doors to young leaders?
Click here to read an articulate message from a Gen Y’er who believes three myths are preventing a qualified pool of young people from having opportunities to contribute at the highest levels.
Helping foster youth to beat the odds and achieve life’s dreams…one by one.
For children who grow to adulthood in foster care, without the love and support of a permanent family, the odds of success are slim. Many will join the ranks of the chronically unemployed, the homeless, the high school dropouts. A recent study found that within five years of reaching age 18, 80% of young men had been arrested and 75% of young women were pregnant. Fewer that 6% had earned a college degree.
A Kinship Center volunteer committee helps foster youth beat those odds with a caring hand and some specific support through fundraising dollars. Here’s a letter from a former foster youth who received mentoring and help from this committee to complete high school and gain university admission to pursue an interest in marine science.
“Dear Cypress Committee, Let me give you a little update…
I just recently completed my sophomore year at the university! The last course was actually a month-long travel course to Palau. The Republic of Palau is basically in the middle of the Pacific Ocean and I had the opportunity to study the jungle/marine ecosystems and ecology of the islands. I also learned about the Palaun culture, economy, politics, clan systems, etc.
One of my favorite parts of the course though was all of the activities that we did. I kayaked between many jungle infested islands, snorkeled above some of the most colorful coral gardens that the world has to offer (and saw basically every color fish you can think of). I also went scuba diving through some massive underwater caverns, saw countless amounts of sharks, turtles, hige schools of barracudas (also giant barracudas which are fierce and scary!), napoleon wrasses, jellyfish and so much more!
I also loved hiking through the jungle and finding Japanese bunkers and caves that were used during the bloody battle of Peleliu in WWII! Every day was absolutely incredible! Learning, exploring, adventuring, and experiencing anything is honestly what I am made for!
This summer I will be working with a Group Home as a child counselor…I am very excited for this summer…i feel that with all of my experiences I am getting closer to finding my true goals in life.
Toward the end of the summer, as a university Outdoor Program Trip Leader, i will be leading a First Year Journey (FYJ) backpacking trip to Havasu for incoming freshmen before orientation week. I will also be an Orientation Mentor. I will basically plan and facilitate activities for incoming new students. I did this last year and am very excited to do it again.
This fall I am enrolled in four classes. I was elected co-president for the Students for Environmental Action (SEA) club on campus. I am very excited for next year…it will be challenging and will require that I truly focus and apply myself, but I know that I am capable of doing great.
African American children account for 15 percent of the U.S. child population, but in the past few years they have represented a third of the more than 500,000 children in foster care. They also have lower rates of adoption, despite legislation intended to create equity.
Click here for a report first published in 2008 that presents key findings of the most thorough study to date, and an analysis of how to improve the prospects of moving to permanent loving homes for children of color.
A courageous and brilliantly successful young man who spent his life in foster care, finally aging out at age 18 without a family, reflects on the anguish of never being wanted. “I often wondered, when I was placed in a home, why someone would always give me back?”
Click here to view this powerful video from Shane Salter, someone who triumphed over the odds but still carries the pain of a childhood and adolescence without a caring adult.
Many of the children we place into adoptive families are older. Most have come from very impoverished backgrounds and have missed the experiences that would have helped them feel deeply connected to their parents and families.
By: Laura Ornelas, LCSW, Regional Mental Health Director, Kinship Center
May is Mental Health Awareness Month. At Kinship Center, we recognize the critical importance of children’s mental health is, and we help parents understand some surprising facts about their young children.
“Mother and Child” will be released on May 7, one of a handful of movies that explore the real complexities and profound connections of adoption. Written and directed by Rodrigo Garcia, the film tells the stories of three very different women, who confront adoption from very different perspectives.
Carol Biddle, co-founder of Kinship Center and current President and CEO, is highlighted in the recent newsletter of the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute, as former recipient of the prestigious Congressional Angels in Adoption Award.
A school essay assignment sparked this articulate tribute from 10-year-old Justin, who says all adoptive parents are his special heroes. Read about Justin’s own story and his reflections on what makes a real hero.
Listen to the words of some of our nation’s waiting children…the ones praying that someone will step forward to adopt them. This is a “must-see” video about the plight of more than 100,000 American kids who are in the limbo of foster care.
Ever wondered what happens when children age out of the foster care system? From Place to Place chronicles the lives of six teens recently emancipated from the foster care system in the state of Montana.
Presented by Charles Chamber, Program Director, Kinship Center Family Ties Program
at Input Hearing for Reauthorization of the Older Americans Act
San Francisco, CA, March 3, 2010
To begin, when you refer to “caregivers” in your Topics List, you are primarily talking about a younger person caring for an older person. I would like to request that you add a topic of Kin Caregiver which would refer to an older person caring for a related child. The impact and increase of the elderly having to care for small children in today’s society is very profound.
Parents who adopt children from a different ethnic or racial background have additional parenting tasks as they assist their children in developing positive racial and ethnic identity. One of the leading experts in the field of transracial adoptions is Dr. Joseph Crumbley, DSW. One of the experts featured in this video, Dr. Crumbley speaks to the need for parents to not minimize their child’s experience of racism and discrimination. As you will see in this clip, this is often a very tricky subject for Caucasian parents.
Reprinted from the Child Trauma Academy Newsletter, February 2010
Children are not simply small adults. They learn differently – often making sense of their world through motion and touch. They even express their feelings in physical ways – when angry, they hit and kick. Because kids do not have the cognitive abilities to understand and control their feelings, in order to change how they feel, they may need to actually manipulate their physical state. Traumatized children are especially prone to confusing and seemingly uncontrollable physical sensations and feelings. Yoga, a form of exercise, relaxation, and meditation is particularly beneficial for these children, and for reasons beyond why exercise in general is helpful.
This list of Children’s Rights and Open Adoption offers practitioners in foster care and adoption, as well as parents, a guide for practice and right action. The list also allows us to look at all children in our society through a broader lens. Children come into the world with their rights intact and the adults in their lives have the obligation to preserve those rights until the child can act on them.
A groundbreaking book on the healing power of “mindsight,” the potent skill that is the basis for both emotional and social intelligence. Mindsight allows you to make positive changes in your brain–and in your life.
Using the Power of the Five Senses to Increase Attachment
by Margaret A. Creek, MFT, ATR-BC and Laura Ornelas, MSW, LCSW – Kinship Center
Many foster and adoptive parents come to our clinics, asking for the specific, perhaps magical therapy that is going to fully “attach” their foster or adopted child to them . What they frequently do not realize is that they are already holding the key.
Mistaking “symptoms” as “problems” and missing the chance to be therapeutic.
By Lorraine E. Fox, Ph.D.
As I approach my 44th year working with mistreated children and youth and those who serve them, I am continually discouraged by how often I encounter child care workers, foster parents, and others who confuse “symptoms” with “problems.” Symptoms are a gift from God/nature, allowing us to know when something is not right with our system, so that we can attend to it and give our bodies the care it needs. How would I know I was coming down with a cold, or flu, if my body didn’t ache, sneeze, cough, and generally feel bad? How would I know that I had an infection if I didn’t run a temperature? Sneezing, coughing, aches, and temperatures are not problems, but signals – signs of distress that cue us of the need to engage in caretaking activities.
Children in foster care have all experienced varying degrees of abuse, neglect and/or multiple placements. They typically have increased social, emotional and behavioral problems, most often due to their inability to modulate internal affective or feeling states.
Many of the children we place into adoptive families are older. Most have come from very impoverished backgrounds and have missed the experiences that would have helped them feel deeply connected to their parents and families.
